Vanessa feltz jokes

• Vanessa Feltz spoke out today on Breakfast Television, about the importance of dealing sensitively with male impotence.Apparently she has known a lot of men who have suffered with it.
• Vanessa Feltz will be returning to our screens in the Autumn in her new chat show; Ask Vanessa. Her first two guests will be Kerry Katona and Jade Goody. If anybody from Al Qaeda is reading this.................
• Did you hear Vanessa Feltz was arrested at Heathrow Airport?Allegedly she had 40lb of crack in her knickers.
• Vanessa Feltz is to become the new face for Erectile Dysfunction....
• Did you hear in the news that Vanessa Feltz has been raped? No!...and your never going to either
• What do you get if you cross Vanessa Feltz with Michele McManus?About 5.4 on the Richter Scale.
• A piece of 27-year-old cake from the wedding of Prince Charles and Princess Diana has been sold to an anonymous bidder at auction for 1,200 pounds.I reckon it was Vanessa Feltz, that fat bitch will do anything for cake.
• Vanessa Feltz is going to be starring in the Pantomime Dick Whittington in Liverpool. I guess thats the nearest she is going to get to dick this year then.
• Vanessa Feltz lost 6 stone.She had a shit.
• Vanessa Feltz has revealed she is hoping to get swept off her feet by her Fiance next week. Unless her Fiance is Hurricane Gustav, I can"t see it happening personally.
• I saw that programme about Jerry Springer"s family which told how he lost relatives in the Holocaust. It really made me stop and think.If only we"d given Hitler a few more years we wouldn"t have had to put up with Vanessa Feltz.
• Vanessa Feltz"s waterbed burst last night. The Met office has declared East Sussex a flood disaster zone.
• So Christians believe in Intelligent Design and the world was created by God.Given that Jade Goody, George W Bush and Vanessa Feltz exist, it doesn"t sound all that fucking intelligent to me