Snow white jokes

• Snow White always goes to bed at night feeling Sleepy. Apparantly the other 6 dwarfs are really jealous.
• Seven dwarfs in a bath all feeling happy.... then Happy got out so they all felt grumpy.
• Snow White was in the bath feeling sleepy. He got out, so she felt dopey instead.
• The 7 dwarfs are all excited as the new pope is visiting fairy story land.All week they nudge Dopey sniggering "Well you can finally ask your question!", to which Dopey replies every time "Shurrup willya!"Finally the day arrives and all the dwarfs are lined up with the other characters from the Snow White story, he shakes hands with the evil Queen, then Snow White then slowly makes his way down the line of the dwarfs.As he approaches Dopey theres a small chant which gets louder and louder "Ask him.ask him...ask him ASK HIM>!""Ask me what?" Questions the pope.The dwarfs shove Dopey forward "ASK HIM!","What would you like to know?", says his holiness."Well", begins Dopey, "Are any of your nuns black?""Hm" ponders the pope "As a religion we catholics don"t differentiate between creed so its more than probable that quite a few of our nuns are black . Does that answer your question?"ASK HIM!! shout the dwarfs."Is there more to your question young man?""Erm......do any of your nuns work in Antarctica?""well young man we have nuns all around the globe so its more than likely that we have a couple in Antarctica. Does that answer your question?"ASK HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yell the dwarfs!"Is there more to this question?" asks the pope now getting more than annoyed."Erm..................................are any of these black nuns in Antarctica dwarfs?!"WHAT"! Splutters the pope."I"m sure if we had a black dwarf nun in Antarctica i would have heard of it. So in answer to your question NO!"All the dwarfs collapse on the floor pissing themselves laughing."DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!! DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!!"
• Snow white, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo are sitting in a pub with their mates.Snow white says "Theres no doubt about it, I"m the fairest in the land"Tom thumb says "Theres no doubt about it, I"m the smallest in the land"Quasimodo says "Theres no doubt about it, I"m the ugliest in the land"Their mates tell them to prove it by going to the magic all-knowing mirror, and the three head off.A few minutes later, the door of the pub bursts open and Snow White runs in and says "Its official...I"m the fairest in the land!"Shortly afterwards, the door again bursts open and Tom Thumb runs in and shouts "Its official...I"m the smallest in the land!"Five minutes later, the door gets kicked in and Quasimodo storms in and bellows "Who the fuck is Jade Goody?"
• HOW DID THE 7 DWARVES GET THEIR NAMES?Miss Snow White was a randy cow,And desperate for a fuck,So off she went into the woods,To try and get some luck.She"d almost given up looking,When she saw some chimney smoke,Then she stumbled on the cottage,And went in for a poke.Her clothes came off in seconds.And she"d just removed her pants,When seven dwarves came marching in,With a merry song and dance.Snow White just stood there speechless,And thought she was in heaven,Originally after one good shag,But now she could have seven.Straight away she took command,My fanny needs a lick!And when one dwarf moved forward,She said -You"d better drop your pick.So down he went onto all fours,And said -I ain"t licking that-,Not there, that is my arse-hole,You DOPEY little brat!-The next dwarf started blushing,Do we have to do it here?-Snow White said -Don"t be BASHFUL,Unless you"re a fucking queer-So reluctantly he whipped it out,To prove he was no fool.And Snow White gave a big -Heigh-Ho-.As she rode upon his tool.Now one dwarf wasn"t smiling.Cos he hadn"t had a sniff,And due to his impatience,He couldn"t raise a stiff.Relax- you GRUMPY bastard-,So he did as he was told,And as soon as he was hard enough,He shot his fuckin load.The next dwarf got a blow-job,And she took him deep quite easy,But she just avoided brain-damage,When he sneezed, she called him SNEEZY.With three dwarves left, she turned and said,You"re next, I want your knob!-But no sooner had he entered her,he was sleeping on the job.Wake up you SLEEPY bastard-She wanted more from him.he woke with such excitement,That he filled her hairy quim.The next dwarf rammed his up her,And shagged her fanny raw,A dazed Snow White then whimpered.That should be against the law.-He made poor Snow White tremble,He was so big and thick.No wonder you"re so HAPPY,With that fucking great big dick-With one dwarf still remaining,But feeling rather sore,She said -You"ll have to use your tongue,My twat can"t take no more!-So he put his tongue to work,Where others had placed their cocks,And "cos he made Snow White feel better,She named the last one DOC.So there"s the truth about the dwarves,And how they got their names,By satisfying Miss Snow White,And joining in her games.
• My wife was grumpy last night.I didn"t mind. I quite like being Snow White.
• What"s red and has 7 little dents in it?Snow White"s cherry.
• The 7 Dwarves are in a cave when it suddenly collapses.Snow White is worried for their lives,until she hears a voice from inside the cave saying "I think Gordon Brown is a great Prime Minister".She says,"Thank heavens,at least Dopey"s all right!"
• Michael Barrymore has been sacked from this years Panto of Snow White because of his mood swings.One minute he"d be feeling Happy, and the next minute he"d come all over Grumpy.