Queer jokes

• What do you call a Chinese homo?Bum Sum Yungai.
• Why is Don King like Michael Barrymore?Both will see you get a good fisting in the ring!
• Did you hear about the two gay Irishmen?Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick.
• How do you get a queer to have sex with a woman?Shit in her cunt.
• I hope Gary Glitter grows his hair back before his inevitable comeback tour. At the moment, with his big bald head and huge beard, he looks like a fucking paedophile.
• What does YMCA stand for?You Might Catch Aids.
• Call me an old-fashioned bigot if you like, but I think that what Elton John and his sort get up to is just unnatural and frankly disgusting.I mean, how can you call yourself a man and be a Watford FC supporter at the same time?
• How do you make a fruit punch?Rip the piss out of his boyfriend.
• Old Father O"Malley was strolling through the church grounds one sunny summer evening, when he came upon a little frog sitting by a tree. "My Lord," he said, picking it up: "You"re the saddest, most forlorn-looking frog I"ve ever seen. I only wish you could speak, so that you might tell me your troubles."The frog replied, "Actually, I can. You see, I was once a choirboy in this very parish. One day I offended a passing Gypsy, and she put a curse on me that turned me into a talking frog.""Incredible!" said Father O"Malley. "Is there anything I might do to help you?""Actually yes, there is. The Gypsy said that if I can find somebody to take me home and let me sleep in their bed, the curse will be lifted and I"ll be back to normal.""Well," said Father O"Malley, "the good Lord teaches us to be charitable. I think I can manage that."So Father O"Malley picked up the little frog and put it in his pocket. That night he placed it gently on the pillow beside him and drifted off into a long, dreamy sleep. When he awoke the next morning, the frog had turned back into a choirboy, just as it had said it would. And that, Your Honour, is the case for the defence...
• I got asked to judge "Mr Gay UK" the other week. I said no problem, he"s immoral, against nature and he"s going to hell.
• I don"t understand how people call me homophobic. I love my house.
• Two gays are having sex in an alleyway when they see a policeman walking towards them, they both panic and run like hell, trying to find somewhere to hide. The policeman sprints after them and manages to catch one, whom he beats to shit. When he is satisfied, the policeman stops pummeling the queer and pins him against the wall and shouts:"Where"s your fucking boyfriend?! If I find him I"m gonna shove this truncheon right up his arse!"A voice from the darkness whispers:"I"m in the bin!"
• I"m bisexual. When I want sex, I buy it.
• I got drunk once and ended up having sex with another bloke.He asked me if I would like to see him again and I said no way.Trouble is he"s left a big hole in my life.
• Did you hear about the young queer who left home? ... Just because he didn't like the way he was being 'reared'.
• whats a queer lad and a banana got in common, there both bent