Princess diana jokes

• What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was The Wall.
• Dodo - Dead Di - Died Dodi - Departed Dando - Done for Dido - Better bloody watch out
• Why did Diana cross the road? Momentum.
• What have Princess Diana and a landmine got in common?They have both been laid by Arabs.
• Why is Princess Diana like the Queen Mum? one died at 101 and the other at 101 mph.
• What did Di wear for her funeral? A dark blue bonnet.
• What did Princess Diana do when she heard the driver had been drinking? She hit the roof.
• What would Princess Diana be doing now if she was still alive? Scratching the fuck out the lid of her coffin.
• It annoys me when people claim they were more hurt when Princess Diana died than when they lost a member of their own family. I was genuinely hurt. Her car knocked me clean off my motorbike, plus my camera was ruined.
• How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.
• What did Princess Di turn into at midnight?A wall.
• As the inquest has decided that chasing pack of paparazzi were to blame, perhaps it was unwise to have that "Princess on Board" sticker in the back window!
• Why did Princess Diana cross the road?She wasn"t wearing her seatbelt.
• What"s the difference between Diana and Tiger Woods? Tiger Woods has a better driver.
• After the trial the coroner concluded that Henri Paul, Princess Diana"s driver, had been under the influence of drugs.He"d used speed and then smack.
• What"s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?Princess Diana wouldn"t be seen dead in a Skoda.
• why did princess diana cross the road? she wasn't wearing her seatbelt