Premature jokes

• ATTENTION: for all men who suffer from premature ejaculation, there will be an anonymous meeting at the local pub tomorrow......Be sure to come early!
• My therapist told me that Tantric Sex was a great cure for premature ejaculation, so I tried it, and he was wrong.Luckily the photo of my Wife still works a treat.
• I used to get teased at school for being small, because I was born prematurely. My dad told me they were wrong, I just survived the abortion.
• My mate really suffers badly from premature ejaculationHe entered a wanking race last week and finished first and second.
• Premature ejaculation..the biggest compliment a man can pay a woman......and they fucking moan about it!
• I"ve been told that one good thing about having premature ejaculation is that you can save heaps of cash. My friend Mike is a sufferer but I can attest, he"s definitely paid off three mortgages in the last 15 years, all with money he says he"s saved from what he would have spent on porn if he was normal.He reckons he bought the video for Debbie"s Dirty Desires back in 1992 and still hasn"t made it past the age certificate warning.
• They"ve invented a new condom that cures premature ejaculation. It"s coated on the inside with anaesthtetic.The big advantage is that you can turn them inside out and have her up the wrong "un and not have to wake her up and listen to her complaining.
• What"s the difference between payday and a guy who"s crap in bed?Payday never comes too early.
• Why do men get confused between hide and seek and sex?In both cases after one minute they shout, "Ready or not, I"m coming!"
• I went to the doctor"s a few weeks back. I told him that I"ve just started seeing a gorgeous girl and I"m having trouble lasting more than a few minutes when I fuck her.He told me, "maybe it would help you last longer if you thought about something horrible when you get aroused, like naked grannies or dead children."It didn"t work at all... now I have a terrible problem with premature ejaculation!
• A young couple on the brink of divorce visit a marriage counsellor. The counsellor asks the wife what is the problem. She responds, "my husband suffers from premature ejaculation." The counsellor turns to her husband and inquires, "is that true?" The husband replies, "well, not exactly - it"s her that suffers, not me."