Facebook jokes

• I was chatting to an old girlfriend on Facebook last night. We went on about all the good times we had and the unusual places we had shagged.She suggested we meet up and try and rekindle some of that joy. I explained that I was slightly older, greyer and a bit thicker round the waist than I used to be. She teased me a bit and said that was only expected after all these years.She said that she had even put on a few pounds herself.So I told the fat bitch to fuck off!
• Did you hear about the priest with a lisp?He tried logging on to Faithbook
• Barry George, the guy just acquited of Jill Dando"s murder, has vowed to never stalk women again after eight years in prison.Don"t be too hard on yourself, Barry, since you went in they"ve invented Facebook and we"re all fucking at it now.
• Schoolgirls are claiming that, during the summer holidays, they are bombarded with a large number of sexually explicit (and somewhat desperate) messages on sites such as Facebook. Don"t worry girls, it will all calm down in September - when the teachers go back to work.
• facebook.cn, the Chinese version of Facebook, was launched earlier today.Within hours, it had 12 million pages, but unfortunately, they"re all the same.
• Simon Weston has launched a new social networking site for burns victims, it"s called Facecook.
• One thing I don"t like about Facebook is that they broadcast to the whole world every subtle change you make to your profile. Normally this is no big deal until your friends start reading too much into certain news feeds like... "Ryan has left the group "I have never had sex with a goat""