Down jokes

• Rob"s getting a lot of stick on here after the site was down over the weekend.It can"t be easy though, running a child sex traffic ring AND keeping the site running smoothly.
• The crossword editor of the sun newspaper died today, his funeral is on monday...he"s going to be buried six down and three across
• One day a farmer"s donkey fell down into a well. The animal criedpiteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do..Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to becovered up anyway;It just wasn"t worth it to retrieve the donkey.He invited all his neighbours to come over and help him. They allgrabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, thedonkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, toeveryone"s amazement he quieted down.A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. Hewas astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit hisback, the donkey was doing something amazing.He would shake it off and take a step up.As the farmer"s neighbours continued to shovel dirt on top of theanimal, he would shake it off and take a step up.Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edgeof the well and happily trotted off!Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick togetting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each ofour troubles is a steppingstone.. We can get out of the deepest wellsjust by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.Remember the five simple rules to be happy:Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.Live simply and appreciate what you have.Give more.Expect lessNOW ..Enough of that crap . . . The donkey later came back,and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him.The gash from the bite got infected andthe farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.MORAL FROM TODAY"S LESSON:When you do something wrong, and try to cover your ass, it always comesback to bite you.You have two choices...smile and vote this down, or vote this up tospread the fun.
• What"s the difference between Father Christmas and a Jew?Father Christmas goes down the chimney.
• What"s the difference between having a badly poured pint and having a child with Down Syndrome?If the head"s too big on your beer you can blow it off
• I"m reading a book on helium at the moment. I"m having trouble putting it down.
• My mate has no luck with women and whenever he"s down in the dumps he gets a new girlfriend. So I"ve told him try somewhere else