Cook jokes

• How many men does it take to change a light bulb?None - let the bitch cook in the dark!
• How do you know when a cabbage is cooked?When the wheelchair floats to the top!
• A guy walks home after buying a cock-sucking frog. He walks into the kitchen, where his wife is doing the dishes, and plonks it on the table."What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?" she screams."Teach it to cook and fuck off," he replies.
• I came downstairs this morning and the wife was by the stove cooking breakfast in her slippers. I said to myself "I must buy her a frying pan!"
• What is the first thing a battered wife does when she gets home from hospital?The dishes and dinner if she"s got any sense.
• What"s the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn"t scream in the oven.
• Why don"t women need to know how to ski?Theres no snow between the bedroom and the kitchen.
• What"s the difference between a white baby and a black baby?About 10 minutes on high.
• What"s brown and taps on the window?A baby in a microwave.
• I think the Suffragettes set an excellent example to all women and their legacy should not be ignored...If you don"t want to cook and clean for your men, throw yourself under a speeding horse!
• I complained to the waiter, "Waiter! There"s a fly in my soup." The waiter replied, "that could very well be, Sir, the cook used to be a tailor...."