Cancer jokes

• Following the shocking news that Jade Goody has cancer there has been a plea for suitable donors of Bone Marrow to come forward, as this could save her life.Alternatively, you could just donate it it to my dog- he is a bit peckish.Please, make the right choice.
• First Jade Goody gets Cancer, then her boyfriend gets sent to jail. Can anything get worse for her?I fucking hope so, she is the source of some of my best material.
• Our 15 year old daughter has been diagnosed with breast cancer.But, on the upside, our 13 year old is developing a nice pair.
• Another shit joke about cancer?Oh goody
• Shocked by the news that Jade Goody has cancer, Gary Glitter has sent an emotional message to her on his release from prison.Dear Jade,So sorry to hear your bad news.If you ever need a babysitter....
• Jade Goody has cancer, and she claims that she is worried that hair loss might ruin her looks. Nice to see she hasn"t lost her sense of humour.
• My wife is forever saying I don"t pay her any attention. So yesterday I was expecting brownie points when I said, "Have you had your hair done dear? You look different."She went ballistic. I won"t forget she"s having chemotherapy again in a hurry.
• A woman visits her doctor complaining of a strange feeling in her lower stomach. The doctor examines her and states; "Well, I can tell you that you"ll need to be buying lots of nappies in about nine months time." "Am I pregnant?" she gasped. "That is wonderful news!" "I"m afraid not," replied the doctor, "you have bowel cancer."
• Son takes his father to the doctor. The doctor gives them the bad news that the father is dying of cancer. Father tells the son that he has had a good long life and wants to stop at the boozer on the way home to celebrate it. While at the pub, the father sees several of his friends. He tells them that he is dying of AIDS. When the friends leave the son asks, "Dad, you are dying of cancer. Why did you tell them that you are dying of AIDS?" The father replies, "I don"t want them fucking your mother after I"m gone!"
• Doctor: It"s bad news, you have cancer and Alzheimer"s. Patient: Oh well, it could be worse - at least I don"t have cancer.
• That Jade Goody will do anything to get back on the cover of Heat Magazine. However, I"m waiting for the issue "How I beat Jade Goody" by Cervical Cancer.
• Apparently "Surgery on Jade Goody "went well"."So she died then?
• Saw my mate outside the Doctor"s today looking really worried."What"s the matter?" I asked."I"ve got the big C,"he said."What, cancer?""No, dyslexia."