Burn jokes

• Mary had a little lamb,its fleece was white and wispy,then it got foot and mouth disease, and now its black and crispy.
• What do you do when you see a nigger go out?Pour more petrol on him and light another match.
• Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
• How do you stop a black guy from going out?Pour on some more fuel
• A man was arrested in London, found pouring petrol on Muslims and setting fire to them.When the Police asked him what he was doing he said, "about 10 to the gallon".
• The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done."
• I always get my loved ones petrol-soaked fake moustaches for Christmas.It"s such a joy to watch their faces light up!
• A man is about to have sex with a really fat woman, so he climbs on top of her. "Can I turn the light off?" he asks. "Why?" she replies, "Are you feeling a bit shy?" "No," he says, "it"s burning my arse!"
• Simon Weston has launched a new social networking site for burns victims, it"s called Facecook.
• People have told me that dark skinned people won"t burn as quickly in the sun. But that really depends on the amount of petrol you"ve doused them with.
• I was really emotional about the Foster Family deaths. Until I found out the fire turned them black. Then I didn"t really give a shit.
• I went to the doctor and said, "I have a rash on my penis.""Does it burn?" asks the doctor."I don"t know, I never tried to light it."