Deprecated: mysql_pconnect(): The mysql extension is deprecated and will be removed in the future: use mysqli or PDO instead in /home/gordondent/hahasincludes/libs/dblib.php on line 17 Boy jokes - HaHas.co.uk | Ha HA Jokes
I have noticed, the older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy.
A man and his young son go into the doctors, " Doctor, doctor- my son has just swallowed a camera!"The doctor looks at him and replies, " Well, leave it a few days and see what develops!" The boy replies, "What? Its a fucking digital, you old cunt."
I was walking along a high cliff one day and saw a little boy, all alone and he was crying. I asked him, "Son, what are you doing up here all alone?" He replied, with tears in his eyes, "My mum"s down there at the bottom. She fell!""That"s terrible!" I said. "And your dad?""He"s down there right next to her. He tried to save her and he fell too!""That"s awful!" I said. We shared a quiet moment there, together, looking out at the sky over that grand cliff. And then, when he asked me why I was unbuckling my belt, I told him, "Son, today just isn"t your day."
In a second grade class, a little girl asks, "Teacher, can my Mommy get pregnant?""How old is your mother, dear?" asks the teacher."Forty." she replies. "Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant." The little girl then asks, "Can my big sister get pregnant?" "Well, dear, how old is your sister?" The little girl answers, "Nineteen." "Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant." The little girl then asks, "Can I get pregnant?" "How old are you, dear?" The little girl answers, "I"m seven years old." "No, dear, you can"t get pregnant..." Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and says, "See, I told you we had nothing to worry about."
A paedophile and a small child are walking through the woods. It"s a foul night; lightning spearing the sky and thunder is crashing.The child looks up at the paedo and says "I"m scared". The paedophile says,"What the fuck are you moaning for? I"ve got to walk back on my own!"
A little boy goes to see the doctor with a problem. He said to the doctor, "Doctor, I was in the showers with all the other boys, and my penis looked different to all of theirs, why is that?"The doctor replies, "I don"t know, I"m going to have to have a look, now you can go behind that curtain to get undressed."The little boy comes out and says, "Where shall I put my clothes?"The doctor replies, "just over there, next to mine."
I was walking along the beach when I saw a small boy lying on the sand who had been stung by a jelly fish. I remembered that if you"re stung by one you should to piss on it, so I whipped my dick out and started pissing on him. His parents weren"t too pleased though, apparently it doesn"t work when they"re dead.
What"s the difference between acne and a Catholic priest?Acne doesn"t come on a boy"s face until he"s 13 or so.
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is Little Johnny on his shiny new bike. The cop says to the Little Johnny, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"Little Johnny replies, "Yeah."The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike."The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.Little Johnny takes the ticket and before he rides off says, "By the way, that"s a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"Humoring Little Johnny, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did."Little Johnny continued, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."
A blonde woman was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note. "I have kidnapped your child. I am sorry to do this but I need the money. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park at 7 AM." Signed, "The Blonde". She pinned the note inside the little boy"s jacket and told him to go straight home. The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed. Inside the bag was the following note. "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this to another."
What"s the best thing about a ten year old girl?Flip her over and you"ve got a ten year old boy.What"s the best thing about a ten year old boy?No need to flip.