Boogaloo jokes

• Suicide bombers have today attacked Bradford city centre. Early estimates suggest they may have caused thousands of pounds worth of improvements.
• Leeds United to the Champions League semi final.100 million pounds.Cost of it all going wrong.Double relegation and a 15 point deduction.Watching Leeds fans crying on the telly (again) after losing to Doncaster Rovers.Priceless.
• MISSING DOGHave you seen my yappy, snappy little shitzu lapdog?Been missing since January from Bellend Rd area of Leeds.Answers to the name...Dennis Wise.Call Ken on 0113 367 6000Will pay reward, though you may only receive a penny for every pound!
• Dear Points of View,I am appalled at the level of racism nowadays on the BBC. Last night I watched Crimewatch. It was all wogs, niggers, pakis and coons!
• Why do people take an instant dislike to Pakis?It saves time!
• To be fair to Josef Fritzl, when he locked his daughter up 24 years ago, he did agree to release her when Huddersfield Town beat Leeds United again. 20/10/84 1-015/04/08 1-0
• Petrol tanker drivers have gone on strike, saying they want more money for the danger of driving about with thousands of gallons of highly explosive liquid attached to their backs.A Shell spokesman said; "There are thousands of Muslims out there who would kill for a job like that!"
• I was flicking through the TV channels, when I came across Monkey Tennis on Sky Sports."Brilliant!", I thought, "monkey tennis."Then I realised, it was just those Williams sisters again!
• Innuendo Man. Thank heavens you"ve come!
• Dr. Who lands the TARDIS on planet Earth way back in the Dark Ages, in a faraway land we now call Bangladesh."Where the bleedin" hell are we?" asks his companion, Donna."Well," replies the Doctor, leaving the Tardis and walking around, "judging by that disgusting smell and the fact that we appear to be surrounded by towelheads (little sheet heads) with no significant intelligence living in caves and mud huts... this is Bradford 2008!"
• Following convicted drug cheat, Dwaine Chambers" successful move into rugby league with Castleford Tigers, another rugby league club has recruited a famous drug abuser.Amy Winehouse, chewing a wasp, is the new face of Batley Bulldogs.